Lifestyle Design

3 Steps to remove Negative Thoughts

Hindsight is 20/20

I love love exercising!  It is my meditation, it is when I hear my inner voice.  And when some of my best reflections open up to me.

So today I was working out, once of the best ones in a long time, the first 60 minutes work out since I started back after my knee surgery.   Anyways, this one struck me…  (over the head like a cast iron frying pan)

I believe in the concept of creating a theme for the year, a core value, a principle that you set for the year.   This give you focus, this gives you guidance, you make decisions based on what your theme is.

I believe that we creators of our own world and that everything comes our way for a specific reason, even if we don’t know it at the time.

My theme for last year was Health and Wealth, my intention was to deal with all the outstanding issues in this area

  • Wealth – Attract more money into my life to provide more freedom.
  • Health – Heal the broke parts of my body to enjoy more freedom.

Sounds good right…. well it probably would have been if I had not had hidden feelings about it.   I didn’t know at the time of course, I only know now that I looked back.   Deep down I was focused on getting rid of all my health and wealth problems.  I was so focused on the problems though, that I never got out of that negative mind set.

I was literally fighting all year with my health and with debt. My actual thoughts

  • Wealth – “I can’t wait to get rid of this debt, I’ll will be happy when I am out of debt”
  • Health – “My body is getting old and is not working the way it used to”

It makes perfect sense, that is what I was thinking so that is what I was getting.  Thoughts become things right.  *smacks self in the forehead*

I have some ideas for what I want my theme to be this year, but I feel that I need to work on removing my negative thought patterns AND find ways to create positive focused thoughts that will bring me everything I really want.

Step 1:

  • Recognize the negative pattern – what exactly is your pattern?  mine was my mindset, always thinking from a negative point of view.
  • Understand the root cause – you need to dig deep here, why is this happening?  for me, my ego’s distractions in following my soul purpose (wow I just said that out loud) .
  • Take responsibility – It doesn’t matter if the original cause is from an external source, we choose how we act and react.  even though mine was internal it manifested as external physical problems.
  • Decide to create a new positive pattern – Every Morning when we wake up and we are still on this earth, we can decide the direction for the day.


Step 2:

  • Get physical, take a walk, workout anything you can do to break sweat and if you can be out side in nature while you are doing this, even better.
  • Work through each step and journal the entire process.  Writing, with paper and pen, gets you out of your head, allows you to to actually feel the feelings and deal with the emotions.
  • Create and practice a ritual for 21 days to permanently change your mindset.


Sometimes it is as easy as getting outside to walk. Walk fast enough to get your heart pumping and so that you are breathing hard.  Allow your thoughts to wonder from one topic to the next.  Don’t  analyze them right now, just move from one to the other. This allows for fluid motion of your thoughts, this is when your inner voice can break through all the normal noise and become clear.  I have also been very successful using this method while bike riding.  PS. just make sure where ever you are, you are safe.

Journaling Prompts

Sometimes you need a little help to get your started.

  • I have negative or limiting feelings around…
  • What excuses are keeping me stuck…
  • How am I holding myself back…
  • When I have negative thoughts my day-to-day life is…
  • I can change negative thought to positive ones by…
  • How will changing my negative thoughts to positive ones change my life…


Any new habit needs repetition to become permanent in our body, mind and soul.   I personally like the idea of creating a very delicious personal ritual so that you can ground yourself and create a new habit at the same time.  You can make this ANY thing that inspires you personally.

Here is a ritual to get you started:

  1. Find a comfortable area in your house or outside and stand straight up with your feet shoulders width apart.
  2. Take a few deep breaths, inhale for 5 counts, hold for 5 counts, exhale for 5 counts.
  3. While standing, visualize a beam of white light coming from the sky down toward your head. Visualize the white light going through the top of your head and down to your feet. Then visualize the white light flowing from your feet into the ground toward the center of the Earth. Do this for at least 5 minutes.
  4. Then visualize the Earth’s energy traveling back up the beam of white light to support and nurture you.
  5. Visualize white light flowing down your arms and out your hands. Then visualize the white light turning in a clockwise motion around your whole body.
  6. Visualize all the negative energy leave your aura.
  7. Finish the visualization with swirls of blue and green light filling your aura in a clockwise motion.


Will following this mean you will never have another negative thought… not likely.  But it is something you can put in your toolbox, something that will help you when you know that you need to change those negative thoughts.

And you need to practice, completing the next 21 days is just a start on the path. You need to be aware and watch when you slip into that negative frame of mind.

Step 3:

  • Choose to be happy –  being happy is a constant decision, every morning when you wake you choose how the day will go, you choose how you will act, react and interact with the world around you.
  • Find Inspiration  – surround yourself with things, activities and people that make you feel good. Inspiration is everywhere and when you start focusing on it, the more you will find.
  • Stop accepting Negativity – your choice, replace it with compassion and optimism.

In the next few weeks I am going to be working on finding my new theme for 2013 and this year I am better armed.  I know where my negative thoughts come from, but not just that, I have a plan for how to remove these feel-bad thoughts from my life.

Do you struggle with negative feelings?  How do you handle them?  Love to hear your thoughts in the comments below


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24 thoughts on “3 Steps to remove Negative Thoughts

  1. I have never used this. Thinking of a core concept for the year. I like it.
    I like that i can wake up and know that it is a new day and I am in charge of the direction it goes.
    Love your visualization process. Definitely will be keeping that in the toolbox.

    I really am looking forward to 2013. Will be starting fresh again as we are about to move to New York. Lots of big things planned. Would be a great idea to identify my core. Thanks Lori

    1. In the next few weeks I’ll be writing about how to find/discover your theme, I’ll let you know when it is ready.

      I really like to use visualization and guided meditations, it just feels really good to me.

      New York, that is super awesome, I loved the time I was there! And I am looking forward to going back in the future, spending more time exploring the museums and galleries.

      that will be so much fun, I can’t wait to hear your adventures

  2. Just like you Lori I have spent a lot of time focusing what I didn’t want. I started to meditate daily and visualize what I did want and things began to flow. For years I’ve practiced affirmations, visualizations and goal setting always wondering why some worked and some didn’t. Then I had a frying pan moment when I realized that I would mediate and visualize and work on my goals only to revert back to the negative thought patterns. Now I overload my mind with the positive thoughts of abundance and possibility and it works. My life is in flow – good luck with your intention for this year

      1. I enjoyed your posdcat Lori great topic. Kudos to your Dad for exposing you to volunteerism and you passing that along to your children. I volunteered for close to 2 years on a suicide line plus trained new volunteers, so I remember role-playing both sides too smile.

  3. Right on Ciara! I also overload my mind with the positive thoughts of abundance, but it’s not really something I do with intention every day. Almost every aspect of my life is so good that I just naturally feel happy…unless one of my dogs ate one of Grant’s books or someone in my life is having a rough time that I can’t do much about. I have thought about adding more intention to maintaining my abundance mindset when life doesn’t make it so dang easy to just naturally do so. I have some plans for next year to make that happen.

    1. Just as you were saying Joel, it really is easy

      as soon as we give up the control, I am thinking it is part of our growth though. The process to get to the point where everything is just in the flow. And you can do it naturally with faith the universe will provided what is needed.

      1. I enjoyed your podsact Lori great topic. Kudos to your Dad for exposing you to volunteerism and you passing that along to your children. I volunteered for close to 2 years on a suicide line plus trained new volunteers, so I remember role-playing both sides too smile.

  4. My core concept for the past 6 years has been to improve my health… but until now, has never really worked.

    The biggest problem was that tackling my health problems created feelings of anxiety, frustration, anger, etc… and so naturally repulsed me. It was only until I decided my health should come first that I started making progress. I now literally will skip work if I find myself procrastinating on my health goals. Basically, 100% focus.

    Luckily, I’m at a point in my life where I have the flexibility and space to do something like this. Otherwise… who knows what those negative thoughts would have done with my life.

    Good luck with yours!

    1. Totally understand the anxiety! I have felt that a lot.

      I am also really glad to not have to worry about it any more. I am glad that I am at the end of my journey with my health issues.

  5. Hi Lori,

    Oh, the frying pans! I have had those moments.

    I love your emphasis on seeing through negative patterns and moving away from them. It makes sense that the core concept will be more effective when framed positively. Your white light visualization ritual looks great, I want to give that a go!

    1. lol those frying pans are heavy!

      I don’t think we can shrink away from the negative feelings, we just have to feel them and then find the positive side of them and move forward.

  6. It’s a lot of work to turn around that negative, problem-focused self talk – but the hardest work is recognizing that it’s even going on! All the positive visualizations and affirmations in the world will get you just about nowhere if you’re still letting that inner critic run rampant as soon as you turn your attention to other things!

    I love rituals and visualizations to get me focused as well. And patience helps too.

    Choosing to be happy is important, but I believe that we won’t achieve true and lasting happiness if we just push away grief or sadness. I’m finding that the key is to allow such feelings to flow through and out….and then focus once again on the positives that I envision for my life and for the world.

    1. Yes, I definitely agree that you need to feel the emotions and then part ways with it or replace it with the positive. it is when you find your self stuck, you really need the frying pan… or a shovel to get yourself out of it.

  7. I like the idea of using exercise as a step to release negative thoughts. You are right about combining it with being in nature to add to the effect. I often head outside to walk through our meadow when I need to let go of a negative thought. I also use the flow and concentration of yoga to release negative energy.

      1. Ari, I feel like everyday I want to run over here and post “What a beatuy”, because that’s the first thought I get when I see your feeds. But what I truly feel is that you bring beatuy to people (to view and read) and to the person (featured). THank-you.

  8. It’s so interesting… I never thought of creating a theme for my year – a resolution maybe – but never a theme. But the more I think about it, the more I want to do it. Thanks for such a great idea!

  9. Hi Lori :).

    Great post. You bring up such an interesting point here.

    Whatever we think about will show up in our life. So for example if all we think about is our problems then we will notice more of those problems in our life.

    I guess the opposite would be the key. We need to focus on the solutions. For me, when it comes to food I try and be very healthy. I always ask myself “How can I be healthy?” I don’t think about the problem (eating bad foods, lack of proper exercise). Instead I think about “What exercises will I do?” “How can I get in the greatest shape of my life?” etc.

    I like the practical and straightforward nature of your steps.

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